Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
