YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
