Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize