You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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