Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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