ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Randomize
