Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
