grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
