The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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