grandma shit on top of the toilet
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
