even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Randomize
