i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
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