do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Randomize
