No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
