how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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