i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
