some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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