You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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