I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
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