haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Randomize
