dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
