I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
