Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
is that a dick in a sweater?
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
