I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize
