yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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