she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Randomize
