New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
