im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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