i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Randomize
