Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
