is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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