So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
smell my finger.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
