i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
