Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
