There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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