Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
