I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
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