its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Randomize
