I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
