ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
