I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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