I like to think it a success when the cops are called
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
ttyl tear gas
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize
