Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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