We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
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