i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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