READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
