Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
