That's intense
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Randomize
