And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I need water and some morals
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Randomize
