The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Randomize
