Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I have post one night stand depression
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